Taylor Jenkins Reid
1. I had absolutely no interest in being somebody else’s muse. I am not a muse. I am the somebody. End of fucking story.
2. You do sometimes sit and wonder why it wasn’t you, what makes you so special that you get to be safe. The world doesn’t make much sense.
3. Love and pride don’t mix.
4. That’s the glory of being a man. An ugly face isn’t the end of you.
5. Who the fuck do you think you are, cheating on me? You think there’s a woman alive who is better than what you have?
6. Someone who insists on the perfect conditions to make art isn’t an artist. They’re an asshole.
7. When you put your life in your music, you can’t be clearheaded about your music.
8. I wore what I wanted when I wanted. I did what I wanted with who I wanted. And if somebody didn’t like it, screw ’em.
9. It is what I have always loved about music. Not the sounds of the crowds or the good times as much as the words—the emotions, and the stories, the truth—that you can’t let flow right out of your mouth.
10. When you have everything, someone else getting a little something feels they’re stealing from you.
11. It’s like some of us are chasing after our nightmares the way other people chase dreams.
12. I don’t believe in soul mates anymore and I’m not looking for anything. But if I did believe in them, I’d believe your soul mate was somebody who had all the things you didn’t, that needed all the things you had. Not somebody who’s suffering from the same stuff you are.
13. They’re songs. You pull them out of wherever you can. You change the meanings to fit the moments sometimes. Some songs came more from my heart than others, I suppose.
14. It’s so strange, how someone’s silence, someone’s insistence that something isn’t happening can be so suffocating. But it can be. And suffocating is exactly the word, too. You feel like you can’t breathe.
15. Appreciation from people you admire changes how you see yourself. Everybody wants somebody to hold up the right mirror.
16. I mean, there were a lot of teenage girls that wanted to grow up and be me in the late seventies. I was keenly aware of that. But the only reason people thought I had everything is because I had all the things you can see. I had none of the things you can’t.
17. History is what you did, not what you almost did, not what you thought about doing. And I was proud of what I did.
18. Art doesn’t owe anything to anyone. Songs are about how it felts, not the facts. Self-expression is about what it feels to live, not whether you had the right to claim any emotion at any time. Did I have a right to be mad at him? Did he do anything wrong? Who cares! Who cares? I hurt. So I wrote about it.
19. But loving somebody isn’t perfection and good times and laughing and making love. Love is forgiveness and patience and faith and every once in a while, it’s a gut punch. That’s why it’s a dangerous thing, when you go loving the wrong person. When you love somebody who doesn’t deserve it.
20. Do you know what you do with that level of trust? When someone says, “I trust you so much I can tolerate you having secrets?” You cherish it. You remind yourself how lucky you are to have been given that trust every day.
21. Here’s a lesson for everybody, take it from me: Handsome men that tell you what you want to hear are almost always liars.
22. You have to have one person in your life that you know would never do anything to steer you wrong. They may disagree with you. They could even break your heart, from time to time. But you have to have one person, at least, who you know will always tell you the truth. You need one person who, when the shit hit the fan, grabs your stuff, throws it in a suitcase, and gets you away from the Italian prince.
23. I wish someone had told me that love isn’t torture. Because I thought love was this thing that was supposed to tear you in two and leave you heartbroken and make your heart race in the worst way. I thought love was bombs and tears and blood. I did not know that it was supposed to make you lighter, not heavier. I didn’t know it was supposed to take only the kind of work that makes you softer. I thought love was war. I didn’t know it was supposed to … I didn’t know it was supposed to be peace. And you know what? Even if I did know that, I don’t know that I would have been ready to welcome it or value it.
24. It’s easy to disguise almost anything as a love song.
25. I wasn’t scared of regretting not having a child. But I was scared of regretting having a child. I was scared of bringing an unwanted life into this world. I was scared of living my life, feeling like I’d anchored myself to the wrong dock. I was scared of being pushed to do something I knew I did not want.
26. Passion is … It’s fire. And fire is great, man. But we’re made of water. Water is how we keep living. Water is what we need to survive. My family was my water. I picked water. I’ll pick water every time. And I wanted Daisy to find her water. Because I couldn’t be it.
27. No matter who you choose to go down the road with, you’re gonna get hurt. That’s just the nature of caring about someone. No matter who you love, they will break your heart along the way.
28. You can justify anything. If you’re narcissistic enough to believe that the universe conspires for and against you—which we all are, deep down—then you can convince yourself you’re getting signs about anything and everything.
29. You can’t control another person. It doesn’t matter how much you love them. You can’t love someone back to health and you can’t hate someone back to health and no matter how right you are about something, it doesn’t mean they will change their mind.
30. But at some point, you have to recognize that you have no control over anybody and you have to step back and be ready to catch them when they fall and that’s all you can do. It feels like throwing yourself.
31. I’d chased this life with all of my heart. I wanted so badly to express myself and be heard and bring solace to other people with my own words. But it became a hell I’d created myself, a cage I’d built and locked myself in. I came to hate that I’d put my heart and my pain into my music because it meant that I couldn’t ever leave it behind.
32. A part of me wishes you wanted kids, because my kids make me so happy. But … I think in order to be happy like I’m happy, you need different things. And I want you to have whatever those things are.
33. Life is about who is holding your hand and, I think, whose hand you commit to holding.
34. I decided I don’t need perfect love and I don’t need a perfect husband and I don’t need perfect kids and a perfect life and all that. I want mine. I want my love, my husband, my kids, my life.
35. I’m not perfect. I’ll never be perfect. I don’t expect anything to be perfect. But things don’t have to be perfect to be strong. So if you’re waiting around, hoping that something’s going to crack, I just … I have to tell you that it’s not gonna be me. And I can’t let it be Billy. Which means it’s gonna be you.
36. Don’t count yourself out this early, Daisy. You’re all sorts of things you don’t even know yet.
37. Your life isn’t about me, honey, my life is about you.